This is an emergency security communique from the Central Soviet of the Cartel of Liberal Organized Anarchists and Kossaks For Infidels and God Hating Terrorists and Destroyers Of America (CLOAKFIGHTDOA). These directives were developed by the Committee for Security, and approved by the Ministry of Propaganda and Total Media Control.
As many of you know, Operation SpartaKos was launched yesterday to combat the risks posed by the recent discovery of our methods, including the existence of JournoList. Operation SpartaKos will remain in effect; the directives contained in this communique are in addition to the direction taken by Operation SpartaKos.
We regret the necessity of broadcasting this in the clear, but the recent discoveries of our methods and technologies (e.g., emailing between bloggers and the existence of listservs) by the RedState army has forced our hand. However, this should not be problematic in the long term, as if the following instructions are followed, it should prevent further breaches of security.
This is a Condition Mauve alert. Therefore, immediate action is required on your part. Please comply with the following instructions without delay.
While it is no longer necessary to deny the existence of the Cartel, all such admissions should be made under the guise of snark. Denials are also allowed. It should be noted that the confusion caused to the opposition improves the moral of Cartel members; furthermore, the sale of tin foil to opposition members is having a positive impact on the economy.
All communications sent via standard electronic medium shall be encrypted. Evidence has shown that rot-13 encryption is adequate to baffle the opposition.
All Pootie and Woozle images containing embedded messages between Cartel members must now have a color depth of at least 32 bits. This will prevent detection of hidden media directives by the technology available to the opposition.
Our operatives at Microsoft, Apple and in the Open Source community will soon be releasing updates for browsers, email clients and servers and operating systems. These must be applied immediately, as they contain code that will facilitate undetected direct communication between Cartel members.
If you are identified as a Cartel member and confronted by Surrounders or Teabaggers, use Liberal Defense Protocol 117-C-238. Protocol 117-B-595 is now deprecated, and should not be used.
The use of rotary phones and telegraph for Cartel communication is now prohibited. The opposition has mastered these technologies; therefore, they are to be avoided.
When speaking in person to another Cartel member, remember to ensure that they truly are another Cartel member. Make sure that you use at least two of the following identification signs: secret handshake, secret hand sign, secret head nod, secret key jingle, secret whistled tune, secret t-shirt wearing, secret hairstyle or secret adjustment of sunglasses.
There is a new firmware update for implants. If the revision number for the firmware is 9.32.43 or lower, you will need to update immediately. To determine the current firmware revision, think hard about a blue circle inside a red square.
If your Cartel Security Clearance is Not Double Plaid Plus or higher, you are required to immediately forget this entire diary.
This ends this transmission.